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Hello again, here's another round-up.

Games

April

The Fields of Mistria content update may have occurred in March, but I was still enjoying it (and intentionally did not catch up on the content)

I played a little Hello Kitty Island Adventure. Still wholeheartedly recommend it, even if I don't like the way they sometimes lock you out of doing quests

Ooblets is cute, but I think I'm gonna start over at a better time, because I didn't give this game the love it deserves.

All there is to report about Umineko ep 8 is “still not cleared”.

A good friend gave me Void Stranger for my birthday. I am not remotely good at these “Sokoban”-type games, and I'm probably going to need a guide, but if nothing else it is atmospheric.

I got into a weird mental spiral about wanting to play Idle Games besides Cookie Clicker (which I do not own on steam). So I got Melvor Idle and Yolk Heroes: A Long Tamago I like the former in a “numbers go up” sense, but the latter is what I imagine it was like to have a tamogachi (but one you send on quests). It has game boy aesthetics, and multiple color palettes, from cabbage green to “Blahaj” which is exactly the colors you'd expect if you're familiar with this plush shark becoming a trans icon.

May

I chipped away at Rune Factory 5. I enjoy it. Going to talk about it more below.

Fish Fear Me is an excellent quick “Rogue-like” about fishing. I recommend it.

Fantasy Life i came out in May and is an occasional hyperfocus. It has daily stuff you can do for these flowers (I do not believe there is a way to buy the flowers, this is not a gacha) that you need to improve this island. And I sure love improving islands!

June

Fantasy Life i continued to be a part of my life.

Got in a little Umineko ep 8. I'm getting feral and to the point where I seriously want to coordinate times via a paper calendar (possibly a Hobonichi Cousin) when both my brother and I are available and can play. Yes I know a digital calendar would be better for this.

So you may be aware, Rune Factory: Guardians of Azuma came out in June. While I did purchase it, I am still playing Rune Factory 5 because everyone who played 5 tells me that I will be unable to go back to 5 if I start the new one, so I'm finishing RF5 first at the very least. I love RF5, though I feel I'm part of a small group who loves it.

Okay, so Mastodon got me back into Stardew Valley and this is the part where I confess I hadn't actually played 1.6 to my knowledge. I installed a bunch of mods including one to make addresses to the Player Character Gender Neutral. I'm really hoping Haunted Chocolatier will not have this issue.

Moonstone Island got an update, and I played like a day of it, because I seemed to run into weird glitches and bugs (double mail). I should see if it's fixed by now, I do like that game and recommend it, and I'm glad it's still getting updates.

Hades II had a major update (unlocking romances I'm pretty sure) and yes I'm still far behind, but I like to take this sort of thing at my own pace.

I really have to praise Hello Kitty Island Adventure. It had a “pride” event. While it did not explicitly State what immediately springs to one's mind about pride in June, it was really clear from context what the subtext was.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Game-wise)

I bought myself an XBox Controller in June, because there are many PC games I have (like for example, beautiful Supergiant Game no one played Pyre, or the Atelier games for example) that would be best with a controller. So Among things like playing Pyre and maybe finally beating Atelier Marie Remake I would like to enjoy more stuff this way,

Things I'm looking forward to (Game-wise)

I'm speaking from the future but I marked the day the July Fields of Mistria update came out in my calendar. There are things I'm looking forward to game-wise (Though I felt I “Ate” very well in May and June especially) but I'm gonna be trying to save a small amount of money. I'll talk about it later in this post.

Books

Not a bad time for me, especially for manga and comics / graphic novels.

April

In April, I finally finished Kimi ni Todoke. I learned there's a sequel series, but my library so far doesn't seem interested in buying it,

I was struck by the urge to reread We Were Liars, and yes I will probably reread it again this year.

During the theoretical Harrowing of Hell period this year, I read Evan Dahm's The Harrowing of Hell. Even as I type this, months later, I do not know what to say about it. I did not hate it, I especially loved its use of color, but it's more like I straight up do not know what to say about the narrative. But I also was never that into this part of Christianity. To be honest currently I only follow Lent because each year I want some Pączki that is produced locally and as per tradition once lent starts those go bye-bye for the year.

I started reading Yokohama Kaidashi Kikou. I had read the whole thing before, as a scanlation. I was thrilled to see it come Westwards. It's so beautiful, but also sad, and I think it has that Mono no Aware (物の哀れ) feeling down well.

May

I started a reread of Check, Please!. Yes, this is basically my emotional support webcomic.

I read Yokohama Kaidashi Kikou vol 2 and started volume 3.

I read and finished The Chromatic Fantasy by H. A. An A+ comic.

June

In June, I read the final volume and therefore finished the Making Friends series by Kristen Gudsnuk. Beautiful ending.

I read Lore Olympus 8. Quite enjoyable.

I read Love Letters for Joy by Melissa See and I need more people to read this book and See's first one You, Me, And our Heartstrings (same world).

I Started The Book of Alchemy by Suleika Jaouad, and it's a hundred day journaling project. I am not forcing myself to do it daily, just to complete it at my own pace.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Reading-Wise)

I have an embarassingly long backlog. I know I should prune but… Nope! Not gonna.

Things I'm looking forward to (Reading-Wise)

Well the comics I were planning on pre-ordering for Autumn / Winter got pushed back, which to be honest, is probably good news for my wallet

Miscellaneous Media

April

I am 100% serious: Watch Pokemon Horizons. It's genuinely good.

I listened to Cast of Wonders ep 589 – The Answer of the Fickle Heart written by Eden Frenkel with Narration: Harini Narayanan. It's great fantasy tale, read it.

I watched more Vinland Saga. Still in Season 1 with Feral Gremlin Thorfinn.

I decided it was a great time to subscribe to Dropout TV, so I watched some Game Changer.

May

Did you guess? It's Re: Dracula season again.

Watched a little Muppets

My brother wanted to watch Deadpool 2, so we did. Maybe I was just a grump but it took a while for the Deadpool movies to grow on me. I still wouldn't call myself a fan, but they're enjoyable.

During a migraine I listened to a LeVar Burton Reads episode- “Small Medicine” by Genevieve Valentine. This (noticing episode-wise there hadn't been an update in a while) was how I finally noticed LeVar Burton was no longer doing this podcast, which of course made me sad, but I'll live.

In this house we watch Pokemon Horizons and Vinland Saga and enjoy it. (You will enjoy both I promise).

I managed to catch a Monsterdon and on the plate that week was Forbidden Planet (1956). I enjoyed watching it with everyone.

Was in the mood for a bit of Pokemon Indigo League. I think what I really enjoyed about the early seasons of the original pokemon is that Ash is an asshole, and I think that sort of gets taken away as the series progresses, but I was not reliable at watching it so this may just be the fog of nostalgia.

June

Slowly but surely continuing my Pokemon Horizons hype train.

During a migraine (yes that's when I listen to a lot of short fiction podcasts) I listened to Cast of Wonders ep 606: My Mother's Voice and the Shadow written by A. W. Prihandita with narration by Omega Francis. Listen to this episode I cannot stress it enough.

I've kept up with Re: Dracula

I tried something different and listened to the Audio Drama Little Boots. It's well-done, but I have to say I don't know that much about Roman history. Probably a gap I should fix!

I thought it was also a good time to Re-listen to the audio drama Falling Forward.

Since The Holmwood Foundation audio drama sequel to Dracula launched, I started by re-listening to ep 1 and 1.5. Then episode 2 and 3 came out. I quite like it so far.

I Listened to the Drama Disability Tour Bus. Very nice.

I Watched the Monsterdon movie Bog from 1979. It was fun to do a group watch. I got tired of waiting for the Bog Monster to appear though!

I Watched Labyrinth with a good friend of mine. We'd been meaning to do it for a couple months but timing never worked right for either of us. It's a good movie. Probably one of my favorites.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Miscellaneous)

I really want to listen to more Audio Dramas (I will not say how many podcasts I'm subscribed to). I have a lot to choose from, I think maybe it's overwhelming me!

I'm adding more stuff to my watch list without actually watching much of anything (except the above). I'm hoping it will be easier once I get to fall, like I could crochet a repeating pattern while watching something.

Things I'm looking forward to (Miscellaneous)

Autumn! In general, good stuff is coming out, and it's a matter of finding time to watch it.

I think in September or so Remnants: An Audio Drama is restarting, so before then I should probably re-listen (and weep ) to the first season.

As people who know me know, Hobonichi starts selling next year's Techos and such starting in September (unless you want an April-Start one). August starts the line up promotion. I'll need to save up some money for this purchase in September (especially because of the damn tariff situation). I'm hoping to reuse this year's cover, but I suppose that's to-be-determined.

Hope to see you soon!

Games

January

In January I played a variety. I got back to Rune Factory 5 for a bit, slowly but surely “progressing”. It's on my list of things to beat relatively soon. I also played a bit of Animal Crossing New Horizons which sometimes signals my mental health is bad. Not always, but often. Yes in this case it was a sign my mental health was bad. But enough about that! I also played a little Umineko Chiru: Episode 8 and I'll let you know right now: Still haven't beaten it. Scheduling and coordinating things with people is difficult!

I got back to Hades II. I am not nearly as far as some people are, partially because I tend to do it in small chunks, like one or two runs a in a week. Or month.

The rest of my January games are Visual Novels. Got back into Rose of Winter because of the webcomic The Golden Boar. I still have at least one more path to do whether or not I care about getting all the endings.

I played a little Vampire Therapist. I really love the game, but it sometimes does the therapy a bit too well in my brain. I think that's why I haven't beaten it yet, because I will go “You know I should bring this issue up to my therapist” write it down, and then close the game. I do wonder how a licensed therapist would feel about this game. I imagine they wouldn't want to play it in their off time because it might be a bit too much like their job (even if they are not a vampire).

February

More Rune Factory 5. I take a break from it after this month, because I decide I don't want to burn myself out on anime farming before Fields of Mistria's next patch (in March).

I played a little of Fish Fear Me. It's a really interesting concept for a Roguelike. I recommend it, though I suck at it and I'm not super far.

Back in December, one of my friends gifted me Stella of the End and I decided now was a great time to add yet another Visual Novel to my list of things to play. I liked what I played so far. Then… then I decided to play the of the devil Demo because I heard good things about it. I would describe it as a “Cyberpunk Ace Attorney”. There's more to it of course, but I'm not sure how much I should tell people before they try it themselves.

March

Fields of Mistria. Most of what I played this month was Fields of Mistria. And I regret nothing, though I'm getting really “Frustrated” that I keep wanting to pair up the bachelor(ette)s with each other. Some of them would make really cute couples! I'm pretty sure fanfiction is already getting written about Juniper/Valen, for example. It feels weird to go to the Summer Romantic Festival with Eiland when now I ship him with (REDACTED). I'm sure I will find a special someone for my farmer, hopefully it's not March.

At the end of the month I started Hello Kitty Island Adventure on Switch and I got frustrated at some of how the mechanics are set up but I honestly think I prefer it to Animal Crossing in some ways. It's really fun though overall. I recommend it.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Game-wise)

I should probably try to finish some Switch Games (not Hello Kitty or Stitch.) because while I'm fairly certain data will carry over, It feels appropriate to at least finish some games (like Pokemon Scarlet or perhaps XenoBlade Chronicles ) that I seem somewhat if not rather close to beating?

Speaking from the future, I'm trying to finish Rune Factory 5 (to my satisfaction) before the next one comes out in June (though I suspect I will let it sit for a bit and wait for some patches to drop).

And of course I'd really like to beat Umineko but I've been saying that for a while haven't I? Maybe I just need to resign myself to the fact it will happen when it happens. And it goes without saying that I want to get back to Ciel noSurge but once again: scheduling and coordinating times with people is difficult.

Things I'm looking forward to (Game-wise)

Rune Factory: Guardians of Azuma looks nice, and very much up my alley, and seemingly fixes my main complaint about Rune Factory 5 (that there are no seasonal fields like previous games).

Other than that, I'm hoping to purchase my own Xbox Controller for PC gameing (basically it's a pain to share them across computers, so while there is one in our house, I pretty much can't use it) so I suspect I will focus on a bunch of my backlog that requires controllers. (Maybe I will finally beat Pyre!)

Books

January

I mostly read manga in January. Some rereads (like A Man and His Cat) some was trying to make my way through Kimi ni Todoke (I progressed but did not finish it this quarter) but I want to focus on a couple of titles.

The Graphic novel by Hari Conner I Shall Never Fall in Love. If you know me well (that I am a sicko for Queer Regency Romance) it will not shock you that this was extremely my shit.

I also read Legend of the White Snake by Sher Lee, an MLM romance. I enjoyed this one. A snake that can turn into a human falls in love with a prince that needs to hunt that particular kind of snake to help his mother. I recommend it.

February

More manga reading, and also I started a Lore Olympus reread.

Among other things I read The Strange Case of Harleen and Harley by Melissa Marr and Jenn St-Onge. It was a fun read. It's kind of interesting, other than cultural osmosis I hadn't really been into DC stuff at any age, but I'm finding myself more and more drawn to their characters, partially due to these accessible graphic novels, and partially due to the WebToon Wayne Family Adventures. I don't dislike Marvel or anything, just as of late finding DC more interesting to me (as a note while I haven't watched any DC movies so beyond seeing Warner Brothers make a movie just to throw it out for a tax write-off is... depressing to say the least).

I also did a reread of Melissa See's You, Me, and Our Heartstrings because it was haunting my thoughts despite the fact it had been YEARS since I read it. So I decided it was time for a reread and I regret NOTHING. It's a great novel about ableism and music.

March

In March I mostly read Kimi ni Todoke (but still didn't finish it!) and a bit of Lore Olympus. Also noteable: I finished The Selection Series by Kiera Cass. I AM FREE (just kidding it was a fun ride). I also started A Gentleman's Gentleman but have not finished it yet. It's good so far. Ditto The Chromatic Fantasy.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Reading-Wise)

I really need to get back to A Gentleman's Gentleman (TJ Alexander). I've just been taking it really slow. Ditto The Chromatic Fantasy (H.A.). I also have a lot of stuff listed as “paused” in Storygraph and I would like to get back to at least one of them.

Things I'm looking forward to (Reading-Wise)

Nothing specific that I'm looking forward to, but I have like 4-5 holds on things that are coming out by like mid-June at the latest that I am first in line for. RIP, me.

Miscellaneous Media

January

I started Mob Psycho 100 since I'd heard it was quite good. I assumed it was a light-hearted comedy. It is… it is not. I still enjoy it though.

I watched a bit of The Muppet Show. It's soothing even if I never know who these celebrity guests are.

I watched a bit of Ranma ½.

My sicko brain decided to start making my brother watch Vinland Saga since I'd been nagging him to read it for years and he had never gotten around to it. I was really into the manga about a decade ago (I plan to get back into it, there's just… a lot. The manga is like 20 years old at this point). I had heard the anime filled in some of the empty spaces in the timeskips. It is absolutely its own thing, and I love it.

And of course, I'm still watching Pokémon Horizons. It's soothing.

For audio dramas, between episodes of Remnants: an audio drama I continued to make my way through Spirit Box Radio.

February

More of The Muppet Show. Can't go wrong with Muppets. Instead of uploading my consciousness to the cloud I want my consciousness transfered into a Muppet. Not even like a particular one like Fozzie Bear or Grover, I want my bespoke Muppet Body.

We caught up on Ranma ½ this month. I really want more.

Of course there was more Vinland Saga and Pokémon Horizons.

My brother heard about Mashle and wanted to watch it. It's a humorous show, but not really laugh at out loud funny to me (though I'm pretty self-conscious about laughing so that may be part of it), but it's enjoyable enough.

I finally finished up Spirit Box Radio this month. Good show.

But that was between episodes of Re: Carmilla.

March

More Pokémon Horizons, Vinland Saga, and Mashle.

Between episodes of Re: Carmilla I worked on more of my audio drama backlog and went through 36 Questions which is an audio drama musical.

During a hell of a migraine I listened to Cast of Wonders 633: Born in Flame and Song written by Jameyanne Fuller and narrated by Charlotte Moore-Lambert. It is a beautifully sad story about being the chosen one, and Dear Reader: I cried, and it wasn't because of the migraine. A+ Would inflict this sorrow upon myself again.

Another great one that sticks with me is Sometimes it Happens That Way written by Jamie Lackey and narrated by Jason Arquin. A different kind of gut punch of a story. Read this one as well!

Things I'd Like to Work on (Miscellaneous Media)

I still want to work through my backlog of Audio Dramas (while going through Re: Dracula again). I do not want to tell you how many podcasts I'm subscribed to. They'd invent a kind of Tsundoku for podcasts and audio dramas all because of me, that's all I'll say. I'll probably work on a some shorter ones first. Hopefully I will finish the first season of The Magnus Archives as well, but that's not the top priority.

I feel like I want to watch more TV shows and movies, but I'm not sure of the best way to go about that yet.

Things I'm looking forward to (Miscellaneous Media)

Eventually Remnants: An Audio Drama will start its second season. I don't know if that's Quarter 2 or Quarter 3 though. I miss it dearly though. Maybe I should relisten?

I'm not going to say anything about goals in general this time, as I think I'd like to reevaluate those around July or so.

See you, hopefully soon! I hope you read my story A Spell of Grief which was published fairly recently! I think the narrator, Jordan Kurella, did an excellent job.

This comes with a couple changes. I thought it might work better reflection-wise if I write these after that quarter is over. Also I added a goals (in general) section at the bottom.

Games

October

Okay so: Gourdlets is adorable. It's a cute, pixel town sim you build for little gourd people, and you can decorate however you like.

I like Rune Factory 5 on PC but… there are some things about the UI that work better on Switch (for example it thinks I am controlling it via Keyboard and Mouse so there are some things I cannot do like team attacks, because I literally do not know which buttons to press to do that). Regardless, it's fun and soothing.

Vampire Therapist is one I'm savoring every bit of.

EarthBound Beginnings if I recall correctly I spent every bit of playtime in October grinding Pippi's level up so I could grind Ninten's level up because he is a wuss compared to Pippi. I'm not even dunking on the asthma weakness, I just mean it is a shame you cannot take Pippi on the adventure because she has really good stat growth that rapidly outpaces Ninten, and presumably other characters.

In Hades II I cleared the new area added after the patch. A certain really cool “annoyance” was taken out of the fight with Chronos, which I was a bit sad about because while annoying it was a cool touch, but I understand the importance of removing it. Hopefully there will be something that lets me add that back in.

Stitch. is a soothing game end of story.

Moonstone Island is something I'm obsessing over less lately, I suspect I just burnt out on it.

Towards the end of the month got some Umineko Chiru episode 8 in. It turns out when you have to coordinate schedules to go through something together it gets harder to do.

November

I Started Slay the Princess since that new version came out. I plan on getting back to it, there just hasn't been a good time.

In Vampire Therapist I think I've reached the point where I have all the clients I can for the time being.

In Rune Factory 5 I finally got the SEED crest I wanted: the one that lets you find hidden stuff without party members. I was thrilled!

I played a little Hades II, mostly about trying the new weapon Xinth. Didn't really progress any plots or subplots this month.

Fields of Mistria had an update, though I didn't actually get to the new event until December.

I got back to Animal Crossing. I suspect if you chart when I play this game, you could have a pretty good case of proving I have Seasonal Affective Disorder and / or I need a medication change.

There was a bit of Umineko though around this point it became clear that due to our slow pace (and the fact we'd lose the second half of December to family visits) that we were not clearing Ep 8 on my schedule.

December

If you're wondering, in Fields of Mistria I chose Reina to be my date for the festival. I like most of the candidates, though I don't want to date Valen or Juniper because I want them to get together.

A smidge more Umineko Chiru. Did not beat it. Not really a surprise.

I decided to get Doraemon Dorayaki Shop Story, a Kairosoft game. I had played a decent amount of Kairosoft games when I first got a smart phone. I turn this on every so often to relax.

Rune Factory 5 was basically a therapy game for me in December. A very stressful month, and say what you will about RF5 (I get the impression most people thought 4 was better) it is a very fun game to farm in.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Game-wise)

I'd like to finish Umineko ep 8 sooner or later. I'm aware there's some sort of fan disc, so who knows how “done” with Umineko I will be after I get through the next 10-14 hours of story.

I plan on playing a lot more Visual Novels, kinetic or otherwise. I'm still going to prioritize beating Umineko Chiru of course, but at the same time, since that is based on when my brother and I are both available to play it, I may as well play other VNs on my own time.

I really want to get back to Ciel noSurge but I've been prioritizing Umineko time. Don't forget about me, Ion!

I should probably actually beat XenoBlade Chronicles I in 2025. I am enjoying the game, but I feel like maybe my brother thinks that I'm “Savoring” it too much.

Things I'm looking forward to (Game-wise)

This probably goes without saying, but the Suikoden I & II HD version (that hopefully fixes all the problems the original US versions of those had). I heard that Konami is re-translating the games, which makes me happy if true. If nothing else, maybe that cinema in the first game where everyone's dialogue if off by one text box because a contextual note accidentally got inserted as dialogue will be fixed. I'm also hoping they fix the bugs the original, JP or otherwise, had in the fight with Luca (there is someone who has a patch for this, if the HD version is dogshit and I go back to emulating it, I am definitely using that patch); did you know in the original he will never attack your back row? That's definitely not intended.

I have been ignoring Eiyuden Chronicle: Hundred Heroes (partially for Farming and Hades II) but I'm looking forward to the DLC packs coming out.

Also though I do not need more cozy games I am absolutely looking forward to Hello Kitty Island Adventure coming out at the end of January. It looks like it fills the Animal Crossing niche but possibly better? Also the character “Big Challenges” is in it, you know: the unused cartoon gator character that the internet has latched on to. That feels like reason enough to get it!

Books

October

I read Katzenjammer by Francesca Zappia. It's a nice book, I personally prefer Eliza and Her Monsters but that's more preference than feeling this book is bad.

I read Shoestring Theory by Mariana Costa. Premise: The world has basically ended, the Protagonist is basically an accessory to it, but he's going to go back in time to fix things…. by killing his husband. I very much enjoyed this book and I wish I could force everyonet to read it

So, I read The Pairing by Casey McQuiston. This is probably McQuiston's best work yet, but I will warn anyone who wants to read it but hasn't read the description beyond “Exes on European Wine and Food tour”— this book is extremely horny and spicy. If you cannot handle “Bi 4 Bi exes having a competition about who can bang the most people during the European Food and Wine tour”: pick a different book. Also don't read while hungry unless you have a Boulangerie nearby or something.

November

This month was mostly rereads, I won't bore y'all with the details.

I did a few athletic memoirs, because I enjoy them, and also sometimes they motivate me to push myself. YMMV. I think this started over a decade ago when I got really into learning about Everest and Mountaineering. Even if I was physically capable I would never climb Everest though. The industry around it really bothers me. I know it's not the world's most dangerous mountain but people do not give that mountain the respect it deserves.

I read The Spellshop by Sarah Beth Durst. I think this counts as Romantasy, but it's basically cozy fantasy that deals with trauma around a revolution. Also illegal spell-casting while running a Jam shop. Easily a 5 star read.

December

More rereads, mostly due to stress.

I Started and finished The Heir by Kiera Cass. I got one more book to go in this series but I haven't had a chance to read it.

On a whim I checked out The Secret to Superhuman Strength by Alison Bechdel. May not be a shock, but did you know Bechdel makes really good comics?

On a whim I checked out This Fatal Kiss by Alicia Jasinska. It's a PolyAm YA fantasy novel that I believe (I returned the book I cannot check) is based on Eastern European Folktales. The only problem I had with this book is I'm near positive there is supposed to be a sequel, but no sequel has been announced and I want MORE I need this book to be successful!

Things I'd Like to Work on (Reading-Wise)

To start with I'd like to give House of Leaves another chance. Even if I'm kind of a baby about horror I love Metafiction and such.

For Christmas I got copies of Emily Wilson's translations of The Iliad and The Odyssey and Sophus Helle's translation of The Epic of Gilgamesh. I did do some classics in high school (in the sense that I am familiar with all three of these, not that I can recall every detail), though back then there were no gay translations of The Iliad at least in English. I have also been recommended a translation of Beowulf by Maria Dahvana Headley. I haven't read Beowulf, I'd like to give it a try, and I hear nothing but praise for this one.

I'm not saying I will do nothing but read Ancient books (especially since I still am learning to like poetry) but I at least want to give these a try.

Things I'm looking forward to (Reading-Wise)

I don't know if this counts as a “looking forward” as it's already out, but Seanan McGuire's 10th book / novella in the Wayward Children series came out earlier this month ( Adrift in Currents Clean and Clear ). Due mostly to ECT scheduling I have not had a chance to read it, but I am definitely excited to read it / have my heart broken.

I am absolutely looking forward to TJ Alexander's A Gentleman's Gentleman. I love queer regency romance in general, but basically I squeal with glee whenever someone writes a trans one.

Miscellaneous Media

October

I got to enjoy some of The Amazing Digital Circus in October, specifically episode 3. I love this show, though it's definitely unlike anything I've ver watched before.

I listened to a wee bit of The Magnus Archives, namely Season 1 episodes 36 and 37,

We got back into watching Gravity Falls. I think we finished the first season but I'm having some ECT brain issues regarding that.

Remnants the audio drama / podcast by Eira Major as always broke my heart.

There's this podcast I like, Shelterwood. Sadly I got really behind in it after October.

Someone on Mastodon introduced me to the music doujin circle sEa-PuLsE. The first thing I graved was their concept album: Levorgelna Ep 1. I really like concept albums but I get the impression that's unusual for most people.

I got the chance to watch Werner Herzog's Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979) as part of Monsterdon. I had ear issues at the time and couldn't hear the best, but I want to rewatch it. And then maybe watch it in German.

I tried the premiere episode of The Holmwood Foundation. I like the concept, I'm glad it got funded but I didn't have the money to support it.

After I fell in love with Eira Major's Remnants audio drama, I started listening to previous work, like Clockwork Bird.

November

Since Remnants was on break, I was taking part in the official relisten (that basically begs you to get a red-string board). The problem is that show is depressing and I could not keep up with the default pace. I'll definitely relisten and take more notes, but at my own pace.

In November I finished Clockwork Bird. I think it's pretty good for a first attempt at an audio drama, not that I'm at like, conniseur levels yet.

So of course the next thing I did was continuing going through Eira Major's back catalogue so in November I started Spirit Box Radio.

I got a wonderful opportunity. I watched Labyrinth. I really like it, to the point where I may order a DVD of it (there's a 100 dollar special edition but I don't think I can justify That purchase). Anyway if he were still alive I would hire David Bowie for baby-sitting, that movie showed me he's great at it.

I am finally becoming culture. We sat down and watched the first episode of The Muppet Show

I was having a hankering for Lady Gaga (I was quite into the Fame and the Fame Monster in late high school early college. So I asked someone who listens to far more pop music than I do where to go from there. I was recommend the Born This Way album. It's great.

We tried out Ranma ½. It's solid. If I recall correctly, we had the first volume of Ranma ½ (which probably planted some seeds of Gender in me lol) in what I think must have been the late 90s early 00s. It was flipped so it was left to right. It clearly left an imprint on me. If it matters I was watching in Japanese (though you'll see I tried the dub later). I think it's neat they used the original cast.

December

By this point you must understand: unless there is some reason that Remnants is not airing, or there's some stuff going on when I want to listen to it (can't exactly go for a drive listening to this tear-jerker you know?) that I listen every. week.

We got back into Pokemon Horizons. Still decent.

I saw Vinland Saga was available on Netflix, so I made my brother watch some. I hope to watch some every so often. It's a brutal show but I really like the way it handles violence and pacifism in what I've read of the manga.

It was bandcamp Friday, so early in the morning I bought myself some albums. I haven't listened to all of them yet (as I need alone time to listen to music, and I did not get a lot of that this month), but of the sEa-PuLsE ones I bought, I have to say I quite like this doujin music circle. I'm beginning to think all they publish are concept albums and I'm okay with that.

I was Hashtag BLESSED with more of the Amazing Digital Circus this month. This episode really spoke to me. It definitely necessitates a re-watch, but that's not an immediate goal.

When my Dad was in town for the holidays, we tried out Ranma ½ this time in dub form. Dub's good, he seemed to like it.

We also had my dad try Dungeon Meshi in which I basically had to explain “Yes the title IS 'Delicious in Dungeon' but I have literally never heard anyone use that title for it.” Anyway, dub good. I came up with an idea for an AU fanfic that I don't feel qualified to write, but if no one else writes it I'll have to, right? Anyway, it's just percolating right now.

My dad wanted to watch some Gravity Falls so we rewatched some of the early episodes.

Since I saw Muppet Christmas Carol for the first time in 2023, I decided to make it a tradition. One important thing to note if you are watching it on Disney Plus: Go into the extras drop down and get the full uncut version. They cut out a few scenes and a song, but I think it ruins some of the potency of the story by taking it out.

We got to rewatch Labyrinth (because my dad hadn't seen it). Yes I think this is probably a sign I should buy the DVD. This was also on Christmas Day. Probably a weird choice but I don't care.

I was told to watch Duck the Halls (a few days after Christmas, we just didn't have time for this on Christmas, see part about Labyrinth.) This is an unhinged, bonkers movie, I unreservedly recommend watching it. I will probably add it to our Christmas traditions.

And I fit in some Spirit Box Radio in the time I had to myself. I was hoping to finish Season 2 before the end of the year, but it didn't happen.

Once my Dad finished his vacation with us, we started getting back into a semblance of a Normal Routine (Speaking from the future here: I am still not back to normal yet. It's taking forever to get that Normal Routine). So we fit in a bit of Pokemon Indigo League: I don't believe I had seen this episode, where Team Rocket becomes stylists and seem to be going straight, but in a gay way; also Brock gets Vulpix this episode.

While browsing Netflix one day, I Started Mob Psycho 100. Not very far in yet, but it's quite nice. This is not a critique but it's kind of jarring. Like the first couple episodes are hilarious, then it takes a REALLY dark turn. It might be something where we only watch it if we're in good spirits.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Miscellaneous)

One of my goals was to finish Season 1 of The Magnus Archives. I did not. Hopefully early next year.

I'd also like to get back to Shelterwood

And I do want to finish Spirit Box Radio, finished season 2 a few days ago. So taking a small break from that.

Things I'm looking forward to (Miscellaneous)

The Re: Dracula people are releasing the Carmilla miniseries starting February 14. I'm excited.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Goal-Setting)

As this is my round-up and I can introduce new aspects to it if I want to, I've been thinking setting a quarterly goal might be a good idea.

Besides getting back into my routine properly (and practicing Spanish more often) there's a couple things I want to do this Quarter— aside from some physical / mental health stuff I want to keep to myself for the time being.

1- Work on learning American Sign Language.

2- Improve my handwriting. I love writing by hand, but it often hurts, partially because I grip the pen too hard. Most cursive methods are made to make writing easier and less painful. So I think working on that every so often would be a good idea.

3- Read one of those translated epics.

4- Read more Visual Novels (and maybe give thoughts about them?)

Hopefully I will see actual progress on that by the end of March!

This quarter has been a little rough on me. I've had physical health issues (that I'm being treated for) all year, but this summer my mental health took a hit. I think I'm slowly getting back to a good headspace.

Games

July

I played more Coral Island though after this month I stopped playing it. I'm sure I'll get back to it, it's just that the news about the Humble Games Layoffs really bummed me out.

I'm taking my sweet time with Hades II. I love what I've played so far. I want a patch desperately.

I played Eiyuden Chronicle: Hundred Heroes some more. Slowly progressing. I like dicking around in this game.

Played more of my sweet precious Moonstone Island. I got away from it after July though.

Because it was the 35th anniversary of Mother 1 / EarthBound Beginnings I and a couple of friends elected to play some of the game on its anniversary. I was the only person in our group to have ever beaten it, which I assure y'all would not have been possible without save states.. I love that game so much, but I cannot say it is a good game, you know?

I started Vampire Therapist. It's great, though I haven't played as much of it as I'd like. Get it. It's good, and there have been free content updates that have dropped (not that I've touched them, gotta beat the main game first) so there's lots of game.

I had a really bad day in July, and elected to break out one of my “Having a Bad Day” games, which in this case was A Short Hike. While I have beaten it before (and heartily recommend it), I did not beat it this time, because my brother and I learned the hard way that the Xbox Controller everyone recommends doesn't like pairing with multiple computers without freaking out. I'll have to get my own controller at some point (I have a Nintendo Pro Controller I use sometimes, but I like the XBox Controller better, unfortunately). All in all I recommend making a steam collection for your ”Break Glass In Case of Bad Day” games. This idea came from a discord buddy, and I immediately stole it for myself and it has served me many times over.

I played some XenoBlade Chronicles I, though it was mostly screwing around collecting stuff. I'm glad I now know I can raise relationships by giving party members gifts in an option hidden deep in various menus. I'm a little bitter I didn't know sooner, but at least I can use it now.

And of course I played Umineko Chiru Episode 7, Maybe episode 8 will change my mind, but I genuinely think despite the heavy material in this episode, it very well might be my favorite (I promise it is not all because of Lion and Willard).

August

I played more Eiyuden Chronicle. At first I was focusing on it because the first of the Story DLC was supposed to come out. As you may know, it got delayed. And so I started focusing on other games.

As in Fields of Mistria. mostly. It is in Early Access, and as a result you can't romance any of the characters yet, but there's already a decent amount of content, and it feels like it does so many things right. It's addressed a lot of the things I dislike about Stardew Valley (And I did not put 500+ hours into a game I dislike. I think the good outweighs what I dislike.) If you want a good farming game, the chance to be non-binary in a game (and pick from a decent range of pronouns, though I must stress as of yet no Neopronouns are included), or just to bathe in a 90's anime aesthetic, might I recommend Fields of Mistria?

I beat Umineko Chiru episode 7 this month, and since my brother had agreed to go through episode 8 with me, this changed when I would play the game (because he needed to be present).

I played a little Hades II. I got my first clear (in the underworld). Play it play it play it.

Did more Vampire Therapist. Haven't gotten super far.

Progressed the story in XenoBlade Chronicles I. I had forgotten who someone was because they didn't seem important and BOY was I wrong. Thankfully my brother remembered.

As you may know, hit Visual Novel Fate / Stay Night came out in August. I had always wanted to play it (and this is the non porn-game version), but I waited about a week to start playing it because there were some major issues at launch. I was getting really frustrated with the bad UI, but it turns out that stops being an issue once you beat the prologue. It's a long prologue though, so keep that in mind. I sometimes play it on Saturdays when my brother can't do Umineko.

I wanted a relaxing game I could turn my brain off to, so I played a bit of Silent Hope. Definitely a game to get back to.

I played more EarthBound Beginnings. Pippi is so strong I wish you could keep her in the party. Seriously, move over Ninten, Pippi has this covered! So of course I am doing some grinding in the cemetery to help the wimp Ninten gain some levels before I am forced to give away Pippi.

September

I played a little more Fields of Mistria but by this month I'd about exhausted the available content. I regret nothing.

All I knew about Umineko Chiru Episode 8 was that it had a choice. This is incorrect. It has multiple choices and becomes a goddamn Professor Layton game. I'm not sure how many of these choices and puzzles matter though.

I booted up My Time at Portia for the first time in a while.

I started playing Rune Factory 5 on PC this time. It has a few hiccups, but it's still a great game. There seems to be a rule that each Rune Factory (well there's a few of them I haven't played) has to have something glaringly obvious problem with it that will be fixed in the next in the series. For the problems I have with this one (not to mention the glitches and bugs) I assume that Rune Factory: Guardians of Azuma will be like this too.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Game-wise)

Since I made the effort to play My Time at Portia I'd like to keep at it, but Rune Factory 5 is awfully enticing.

Of course I need to play more Vampire Therapist, if only for the fact it's nearly October and therefore perfect Vampire time.

You may have noticed Ciel noSurge was not on my list this quarter. Poor planning. I plan to play more, of course. But...

Things I'm looking forward to (Game-wise)

There's a fan-translation patch coming for Ciel noSurge on vita. I love doing these sorts of one-person-audience Translation Let's Plays with my brother, I think he wants to prioritize Kuro no Kiseki (Trails Through Daybreak) since he's several games behind now, so me playing it on my own may be best. I'll have to discuss it.

For Moonstone Island's Anniversary, there's supposed to be a big update (and presumably more decor DLC) that adds festivals. I'm excited. I love this game so much!

Books

July

I don't know why, but I had the urge to jump into a lot of YA Novels again, not super recent ones either. My library's e-book service had Kiera Cass' The Selection series, and I wanted to give it a try because it sounded fascinating (and of course, fun). I finished the titular book in July.

My library also has a fair amount of manga, so I reread Volumes 1 through 10 of Kamome Shirahama's Witch Hat Atelier. It's a very good series, I whole-heartedly recommend it.

I reread volume 1 of Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon: Eternal Edition by Naoko Takeuchi. I had checked out volume 2, but realized I needed a refresher. So I read those two.

I started a re-read of Spy x Family by Tatsuya Endo. My brother's also gotten into it recently, it's fun to discuss how certain wordplay is translated with him. The translators did a really good job in my opinion.

I read a Middle Grade Novel Dear Mothman by Robin Gow. It's about a trans boy looking for and writing to Mothman while dealing with the grief of losing his best friend. I was positive I was gonna cry at the end, but I did not, to my surprise. It's a great book, I recommend it.

I started a reread of the Graceling series by Kristin Cashore. I read the titular novel, and despite how a certain aspect of disability is handled (which I will say Cashore worked on in later books) it's a solid read.

August

Upped my reading goal to 100 books. Probably will raise it again given how many graphic novels and manga I appear to be reading this year.

I read volumes 3 and 4 of Sailor Moon, and volumes 6 through 10 of Spy x Family. And of course, a bit more of Witch Hat Atelier.

I read The Elite and The One which finishes off the first part of The Selection series. There's some short stories I haven't read because my library didn't have them when I checked. Also, there's some books set in the future, but I haven't gotten around to them yet.

I read an asexual platonic “romance” book Dear Wendy by Ann Zhao. I loved it. Romance was in quotes because it's about finding someone who understands you but is more like the best friend you'll ever have and you don't want to kiss them. So that might not count as romance to you. I hope to see more Ace Spectrum romances in the future.

September

Tragedy struck. My Kobo libra 2 bricked. It had lasted about 2 years and unlike the one before it—did not die from a big dog sitting on it. Anyway, I had some perilous days where I was sulking because I couldn't read my e-books (and was refusing to read them on a computer screen) but my new Kobo came. One of the color e-ink models. I love it! Once I figured out the Stylus annotation became so fun. I imagine I will get a lot of mileage out of research using this.

So as you may have expected, those days without an e-reader I read more physical books.

I read Barda by Ngozi Ukazu. I am not familiar with the character, but these DC graphic novels are always so approachable. I know Ukazu has another DC project in the pipeline and I can't wait.

I read Tiffany's Griffon written by Magnolia Porter Siddell (one of my favorite webcomic makers) with art by Maddi Gonzalez. It's really good. Imagine knowing everything about a fantasy world, and when the moment comes for you to go save that world, you find out you are not the chosen one, but someone unfamiliar with the series is. It's great, it's touching, I'm glad I got it.

I read X-Gender volumes 1 and 2 (completing it) by Asuka Miyazaki. The first volume is very informative regarding the X-Gender marker in Japan, but the second volume is a bit different because it was made during the beginning of Covid, so Miyazaki couldn't go to any queer bars and didn't like doing web-events. So that's different than I expected, but it's still good!

I read Patience & Esther: An Edwardian Romance by S.W. Searle. I didn't realize when I bought it that it was erotica (it is published by “Smut Peddler” so this is 100% me not paying attention) but it's not like I'm allergic to erotica on occasion. It's a sweet read.

I also read Ruined by Sarah Vaughn, Sarah Winifred Searle, Niki Smith, which is Regency period I believe? Anyway, I don't think this one is tagged on Storygraph as erotica, but you do see genitalia drawn, so keep that in mind if that would bother you. I love reading Regency Period stuff so this was a nice treat for me.

I read Volume 1 of The Summer Hikaru Died by Mokumokuren. It's a horror story about your best friend dying, some creature replacing him, and seemingly you are the only one that can tell the difference, but the creature has all of your friend's memories. Also it's in love with you, so yes it's BL plus horror. It's a very interesting read and I plan to read more of it.

On my Kobo I read volume 11 of Spy x Family. There's more, but my hold hasn't come in. I also read the sixth volume of Sailor Moon, and while I did enjoy it (Hotaru / Saturn was one of my favorite characters from what I can recall of watching the (censored) anime), I need a break. I've got volume 7 checked out but I haven't read it yet, and no one has placed a hold on it, so thankfully I don't have to haul ass.

This month I finished How to Read Nonfiction Like a Professor by Thomas C. Foster. It's an excellent read about media literacy. It was recommended to me by an academic friend. Foster has written about reading a variety of things. I plan to read his one on Poetry next.

Things I'd Like to Work on (Reading-Wise)

When I finish reading Katzenjammer (Francesca Zappia). I plan to get back to the Graceling series, and also those last books in The Selection. Hopefully the short stories aren't required reading.

If I could shake myself to get myself to finish Children of Blood and Bone so I could get on with the series, reread the second book, and FINALLY witness how this series ends, I would. I think I'm scared of finishing it which is why I'm taking such a leisurely pace.

I'd also like to reread and finish the books I had to return because of my Kobo breaking, whenever the library gives them to me again.

Things I'm looking forward to (Reading-Wise)

I found out Song of the Lioness is getting a comic adaption, though it won't be available until 2025.

In November Dark Horse will publish its first volume of Tom Siddell's Gunnerkrigg Court series (which is an omnibus of the first two volumes of the original publication). I am of course excited.

I have to reread Iron Widow because Xiran Jay Zhao confirmed we will see Heavenly Tyrant this year. Hell yes.

Lore Olympus volume 7 is coming out soon. Too many good reads are coming out!

Miscellaneous Media

July

Because I am too anxious a person to beat Undertale I am watching someone's first time playthrough (Pacifist) and hoping to enjoy it vicariously through their Let's Play.

I watched more of the 1992 version of X-Men the Animated Series. God, Cyclops is such a dick but Mr. Sinister is a creepy pervert.

Watched more Pokémon Horizons.

Watched a little Pokémon: Indigo League because sometimes you're just in the mood for the version from your childhood where Ash can be cocky and a jerk. Good times.

Because the stars aligned, I was able to participate in the Mastodon Sunday Movie event “Monsterdon”. The movie was Invaders from Mars (1953 Version). I really had fun.

I started listening to an audio drama called Remnants which I promise is not just because of its name. It calls itself “Too Weepy For Work” and while I haven't cried often due to the show, it fits very well. It's fascinating, both roles in the show (so far) are performed by Eira Major, who evidently has quite a range.

August

A bit more of the Undertale LP. Slowly but surely making my way through.

I listened to and completed an audio drama called And 195 . It's about a marathon runner who often ends up in other worlds during marathons.

I also tried out an audio drama called Pixie, which I would say is targeted at children. It's a cute one.

Watched more X-Men. Watched more Pokémon: Indigo League this time in honor of Rachael Lillis, who recently died. I mean this with no disrespect to the later voice actors, they're good at what they do, but Veronica Taylor et al were the voices of my childhood, so Rachael Lillis was my Misty, my Jessie.

Watched more Pokémon Horizons. It's such a soothing show.

Continued with the Remnants audio drama. It's something to look forward to every Monday.

September

I am getting close to the end of the (first) run of this Undertale LP. I know to get the Pacifist ending you have to do a minimum of two runs. So presumably there's a fair chunk left.

This month the Remnants audio drama was amazing, especially episodes 9 and 10. I'm wondering at which point I should re-listen / marathon them.

In X-men 1992 we finished the Phoenix Saga. I figured that was a good point to take a break.

Tried this podcast / audio drama called Shelterwood. It's a suburban gothic horror story that is presented similarly to a true crime podcast. It's fascinating.

We caught up to what Netflix has available of Pokémon Horizons. Waiting impatiently for more.

I got back into The Magnus Archives. I don't like listening to it without taking notes which is why my progress is so slow.

I'm quite behind (as I've been prioritizing things like audio dramas lately_ but I like listening to stories from audio magazines. A few Cast of Wonders stories stuck out to me this month:

• All-Consuming by Taryn Rose Frazier, narrated by Dani Cutler. It's a story about having an eating disorder told via self-cannibalism.

• Flawless by Frances Hardinge, narrated by Kat Day, a fairy-tale-like story about double standards raising a boy versus raising a girl.

• Three Wishes to Save the World by Rebecca Zahabi, narrated by Anne-Louise Fortune which is about Individual Change regarding the climate crisis in a realistic and helpful way (despite the fact the story is about using a genie to fix the world) I honestly think a lot of doomers need to read this story. Maybe me using a grocery tote won't make a dent compared to Oil Companies doing their thing, but feeling hopeless and helpless hurts.

Dracula Daily / Re: Dracula is in full swing by this point. Sobbed at the September 20th episode like I did last year.

I listened to an audio drama series called Falling Forward. All of it over the course of two days. It's about a hacker trying to get revenge on a tech bro. It's very good, and the episodes are extremely short. I think it would take roughly 40 minutes to listen to the entire series.

And just yesterday, I managed to make it to the live-tooting Mastodon event “Monsterdon”. The movie was Invaders from Mars (1986 Version). I assure you I did not go into it planning to see the remake of my first Monsterdon movie, but it was a fun watch. It has Really good practical effects, the aliens in the movie were basically works of art. Since a key point of the film is both that the protagonist collects pennies and the aliens eat or need copper, I want to know if by the 80s, pennies were mostly zinc like they are now. I know it's not the right time period, but Tumblr's favorite historical figure, Ea-Nasir (Ea-nāṣir ) with his possibly subpar copper ingots, should have made a guest appearance. Also I've decided because this movie has the aliens stealing copper wiring, it's probably sponsored by those speakers with gold cables.

Things I'd Like to Work on (In General)

I'm hoping to finish the first season of The Magnus Archives by the end of the year. The main obstacle in that is that a lot of stuff happens in Dracula in October (and early November). So while I do want to listen to The Magnus Archives and listen to some of the million other audio dramas and podcasts I'm subscribed to, if nothing else it will require time management.

I try to listen to new music on occasion. I think it's good for me. Enrichment in my Enclosure if you will. I don't really jot down when I do it, but I wonder if I should, and add it to these round-ups (Which get ever longer). My main worry is while I like music I feel I don't really have anything profound to say about it. I'm not sure it'd be interesting to hear “I found a favorite version of Der Tod und das Mädchen and it's by Nathalie Stutzmann and I bought a digital version of the album immediately afterwards and listened to it on repeat”. I mean if you'd find that interesting by all means tell me.

Things I'm looking forward to (Miscellaneous)

Monsterdon will work differently for October. Last I heard it would be all Dracula or Dracula-adjacent movies. If I participate, I'm going to specifically make it a goal to not be a huge asshole about the differences between the movies and the novel.

I looked it up. I will get new Pokémon Horizons episodes in November. Gotta be patient.

I have no idea when new Pokémon Concierge episodes are coming, and that makes me sad, same with Delicious in Dungeon / Dungeon Meshi and I fear I may go into withdrawal despite the fact there are many good things to watch (presuming streaming services don't just throw them in a shredder as a tax write-off).

I still haven't watched Bridgerton or gotten back into Riverdale. There's too many things to watch!

And that covers most of the last 3 months. I hope you found it interesting. Let me know if there's anything you think I should get into, though give me a lot of patience because I am slow at listening to suggestions.

I've been in a bit of an Art Funk, so I was going through one of Twyla Tharp's books: The Creative Habit. I had read it before, but maybe not as thoroughly. There's this part where you are to fill out your own “Creative Autobiography”, 33 questions that are supposed to help guide you. This is only partially about that.

Anyway, It took me days to fill out, because part way through I realized, I am not just a writer—I dabble in music, I obsess over the Fiber Arts. Such people Tharp thinks are cursed, as opposed to one obsession / gift to drive you. I understand why she thinks that. However, for someone with ADHD, juggling multiple plates like this suits me better. Part of this month wasn't spent writing, for a variety of reasons, but part of it was I needed to fulfill my musical creative yearnings, fulfill my fiber arts creative yearnings. I succeeded, not in the sense of producing much, but in listening to my needs. And magically, once I started paying attention to that part: I started being able to write again.

The Visual Novel Umineko no Naku Koro ni says the smallest amount of people needed to create a Universe is two. I think that's true of art as well, at least according to a lot of the answers I left. I wanted to be acknowledged. I wanted someone to respond to what I wrote or made. I was shouting into the Void, and I wanted the Void to at least greet me.

If you wrote and never showed anyone, and hypothetically, all evidence of these stories or poems were destroyed, and then you died, if no one saw the poems can anyone say you created art? This is a question I struggle with. If I don't call your work ”Art” in this case, it sounds like I am denying your work. Maybe I am? I am NOT saying The Industry ™ has to acknowledge you. I more mean, I would not know about Henry Darger if no one had discovered his work after his death. Was he content to keep his work to himself? I genuinely don't know. If you are: great. I am not. I want a Universe, even if it's a small one. And I have a hard time believing that's only true of me. If you wrote a fanfic and published it, are you really okay with no one else reading it? Not even kudos-ing it?

I think this is part of why I enjoy Tumblr's just leave a comment fest for commenting on works on Archive of Our Own (Ao3). An email notification that someone likes your story is wonderful. But an email saying someone left a fic on your comment, whether its key-smashing, or all caps unhinged yelling, or a thoughtful analysis, it's wonderful! The Void answered, if you will. And if you participate in that festival, YOU are the Void in this instance.

Even if I don't agree with Tharp about the idea of enjoying making multiple types of art, I very much recommend the book so far. It's given me a few ideas of how to proceed, and even for the writing, fortunately ”Be a Social Media Influencer” is NOT one of the steps I made thanks to this creative Autobiography. I may actually have to talk about my accomplishments more often but maybe it's good for me.

Anyway, if you'll excuse me, the summer comment fest is running through the 28th, I have some more fanfiction to comment on.

Most of my meditation these days is based on visualization and imagination. I've had a really intense inner life for as long as I can remember, and I recently started deliberately mapping it all out and developing a cohesive world I can travel in my mind. I start in front of my house there, which is in a tree like some kind of fairy tale because it can be, imagination is fun.

From there I travel to whatever part of the world makes sense for the type of meditation I want to do. I might go to the sacred grove for druid work, sit by a lake to think deeply about something, or revisit places I've been in the real world to draw on those memories. Sometimes that's just unguided wandering, sometimes I'll follow a recording, sometimes I use oracle decks. The treehouse I mentioned connects to the world tree and from there I can access all the possible worlds I could imagine.

Fantasy Worlds

Since I got the Vibe Check Deck, I've been doing a lot of that last one. It's a deck of AI-generated art showing places of all kinds. Small rooms, shrines, restaurants, markets, landscapes, etc. All of it gives me post-apocalyptic sci-fi vibes, which is kind of peak optimism for me. And I'm not finding it easy to be optimistic lately, so I like to visit these worlds after the end and believe in a world where there is an after and people still find meaning and connection.

In this post I shared a picture of one of these readings. I typically draw three cards, one for the general setting, one for my home/place in it, and one for the way those come together to create a story. In that example, the sunny green market makes me feel like this is a solarpunk world featuring cooperation and shared resources. The little cottage surrounded by pink foliage and clouds in the second one is exactly the kind of place I would love to live and sings to my little witchy heart.

The third card shares the color palette with the house and the buildings easily match up with the cityscape in the back of the market. None of the aesthetics in these cards really seem to match and I wouldn't expect to see them all in one movie. In particular, the third card stands out as being particularly not green and not meshing well with the garden vibes of the first card. This tells me that the people in this world have deliberately spread out to places and come together to share to make the most of their resources and provide for everyone.

I can picture myself here in that little cottage on the border of these two very different landscapes. Making food and clothing to share with people in those other areas when I visit them. The perfect mix of solitude and community that I crave in my daily life. It's comforting to stay there for awhile, to imagine the work I might be doing on that day, to see myself as a part of that community and feel my work has meaning.

Challenges and Guards

There are a lot of Wonderland/Oz/Labyrinth style places in my inner world. A lot of gates and hidden information. I will envision myself traveling through the course and when I reach a block I pull a card to understand what I need to move forward. Something that needs to be sacrificed, a puzzle I have to solve, a gift given, etc. If the door opens, I move on to the next section. If not, I'll keep working on it or might decide that it's not meant for me today and go back.

Basically any deck could work for this, but I tend to use my own homemade oracles. They're tailored for my specific purposes so I can pick out exactly the right one for whatever kind of work I'm doing, and I already have strong connections to the symbols so it's easy to draw on them to imagine what comes next. It might be interesting to try this with a fandom deck. I'll have to keep that in mind.

Rituals and Shrines

Quite a few of my decks were offerings for various deities or ancestors and I use them specifically to communicate with those entities. I'm an atheist, but I really believe in the power of storytelling and personal narratives and this kind of ritual speaks to me in a deep way. Feelings are weird and again, imagination is cool.

A short distance from my treehouse in the inner world there is an ancient temple with shrines to various gods in one direction, the sacred grove mentioned before in another, and various other places of worship. Inside the house there are several small shrines to my ancestors, other guides, and the gods I work with most.

In rituals after I've done the physical setup and offerings, I'll spend time in meditation visiting the most appropriate worship space. I'll then draw cards from a deck devoted to that individual to see how the ritual was and offering were received, ask if there are any further offerings to be given or questions to be answered or challenges to be done. I think the physical components of a ritual are important and effective, but being able to imagine my ideal worship space and have it all look and feel like I want it to is also helpful for me in internalizing it and making it feel real.

Future Experiment: Meeting the Cards

YouTube keeps recommending me videos of people talking about how they use oracle cards. That didn't make a lot of sense to me, because I pretty much use oracle decks exactly like I use tarot decks. But I recently watched a really cool video about using oracle cards to create spreads and I got really excited to try it. And between that and my recent explorations with the Vibe Check deck, I've also been curious to try new things and stretch my concept of how these things work.

I have three decks that are basically just a lot of characters (well, and a few signposts for one of them): Wisdom of Avalon, Heart of Faerie, and the Faries' Oracles. I use them with tarot spreads and it works fine that way, but making a trip to visit the characters or places in the cards and try to talk to them or interact with their world might be better suited and help me get more out of these decks. I look forward to trying that soon.

I joined ADF (Ár nDraíocht Féin) for the first time back around 2010. I've lapsed and re-joined a few times since then and am a current member, but to be honest I always find it's not a good fit for me and I always wind up deciding it was a mistake. Nothing specific about it, I guess it just never really vibed for me.

I do know that one of the bigger problems I had was the meditation requirement. I just couldn't get into sitting still and counting my breath every day, and I didn't really see the point. They have something called a Two Powers meditation, and that was better, but...then what? I'd be like “ok, chill, I feel the two powers, love it, I'm a tree, cool...has it been 20 minutes yet?”

In one of my classes at school we would spend a few minutes meditating at the start of every day to “let our brains catch up with our bodies” and I hated that because I didn't know what my brain was supposed to do to catch up to my body. It's just...there. I talked to a classmate about my frustration and said I understood it was a metaphor but my brain doesn't really need to catch up and I'd just sit there waiting for everyone else.

Eventually I realized that this is likely an autism and dissociation thing. It's not that my brain was already there, it's that my mind never feels like it's a part of my body, it's always floating a few feet above me and kind of observing. So meditation for me would require some much more intentional work to get my consciousness to feel more embodied. I started doing a lot of guided meditations focused on feeling every part of my body from the head down to the toes. It helped a lot.

It's also helped me take advantage of ease with which my mind dissociates from my body and my tendency to imagine complex and beautiful worlds for it to live in since it's never really liked this one. Now that I understand that's not how consciousness typically works and have gotten a bit more control of it, I can switch back and forth with some effort. So I enjoy doing meditations that involve visualization and journeying through the inner world, and then taking a few minutes to feel my body again when I'm ready or when I'm having trouble with anxiety or focus at work.

I realized the core of meditation, for me, is really about understanding what your mind does naturally so that you can develop a strategy and try different methods to get it to do what you want it to do. So there's not going to be a one-size-fits-all approach since all our minds work so differently. My partner can't visualize things at all, so he'd never be able to do the journeying stuff I enjoy so much, but he can sit and breathe for soooooo long.

(Honestly, I'm getting a little better at that, but it's definitely not my favorite.)

One of the things that helped me was finally joining OBOD, another modern druidry group. I'd avoided it for quite awhile because it's far away whereas I've always had ADF groves fairly close to me, even if I never actually went to them. But since I don't actually go and ADF clearly hadn't been working for me, I gave it a try and have been working through the Bardic course they offer. I love it! I've been learning a lot and making a lot of progress with my meditation practice.

I can't really share details, but for meditation specifically, the former chief Philip Carr-Gomm does “tea with a druid” videos on youtube that end with guided visual meditations I find really useful. They do mesh very well with both the meditations from the course and my own inner landscape, but I think they'd also be very good on their own. So that might be a good starting point for someone looking to incorporate inner world journeying into their own spiritual practices.

I want to talk more about my inner world map and what I do there, but I've also just realized the intro to this post is a full post on its own. So I'll do that as a separate entry and post it soon. In particular, I'll eventually get to this post and give some more background on how I use these cards. But I also have some other non-card-related meditations and I'm excited to talk about all of it. Soon!

The TarotTube topic/hashtag I wrote about awhile back got a sequel, which reminded me I never came back to do the second half of the first one. So now I have even more prompts and this will probably be two more posts after this one. Woooooo.

The idea here is there are a bunch of dichotomies and you pick a deck in your collection for each.

Confronting vs Comforting

My confronting deck is the Arthur Rackham Oracle. It was the deck I worked with for my daily readings in September and it was just calling me tf out every single day. It's a beautiful deck featuring fairy tale/fantasy art and I love it to pieces. A lot of oracles kind of err on the side of positivity, and I was kind of pleasantly surprised by how many cards in this lean neutral to negative. Lots of opportunity to dig deep and work on things that needed attention.

On the other side, my comforting deck is Heart of Faerie Oracle. This is my “mom” deck, and I get it out when I need a hug. I think this might actually be the only deck I've ever pre-ordered (not counting Kickstarters). The Faeries' Oracle was one of my first and still a favorite deck, so even though the style seemed very different I was really excited for another Froud deck. And it is very, very different. But it still has that same approach to faerie that makes the world around me feel magical and hopeful.

Every Day Vs Every So Often

I struggled with this one a bit. There isn't actually any deck I use every day, what I do instead is pick a new deck for my daily readings every month. So at most it would be every day for awhile.

I decided to rework it and talk about one that is pretty much always appropriate to pull from and one that is very limited in use/scope. For both of those, I'm not talking about a published deck but one I put together myself! A couple months ago I had the idea to make some decks using old trading cards my (deceased) aunt would have liked and I wound up making a lot of them.

A good every day deck is my Vintage Disney Oracle. I didn't add anything to these cards or assign them to any existing system, just selected cards as they are. Each one has a still from an animated short film and a quote or plot note underneath. It makes for a good quick one-card draw when I just want to break up the day with something cute and fun.

Then I used some vintage Coca-Cola cards and made my own oracle I call Late Stage Capitalism. I picked out all the cards from this set that were the most horrifying to me and that I didn't want to include in the other decks I'd made from it. Then I wrote titles on each card, mostly words that are kind of ironically positive, like things my parents would probably think are good values but make me feel squicky. Examples are “Choices” for a card boasting you can have regular or giant soda bottles, “Trust Me” for one with a Coca-Cola logo force-feeding the globe a bottle of coke, or “Empire” for one that shows all the Mount Rushmore figures drinking Diet Coke.

It's a very gallows-humor sort of deck and I use it when I'm stressed about work or money things. Or sometimes just the need to interact with society. It'd be a real downer to use regularly, but it's pretty good for making me laugh when I already feel like crying.

Over-rated vs Under-rated

I'm approaching this one a little differently, too. I don't think any of my decks are actually over-rated because I think they're all great. But I do have one that I took for granted and that has taught me some valuable lessons on both sides of this.

The Celtic Dragon Tarot was one of my first decks. I loved it soooo much. I used it to read for friends even though I was brand new to tarot because the illustrations are so intuitive there wasn't really any need to have the meanings memorized. And there's dragons! So many dragons.

I lost my tarot decks when I went back to my parents' house for the summer. Luckily, my collection was only 3 decks at that time (all the ones my local Sam Goody carried!) and I learned my lesson not to start collecting again until I actually finished school and moved out. So when that finally happened and I wanted to start by getting my old decks, one was out of print and the Celtic Dragon had changed its card stock. I'd been thinking about that card stock for years. The texture was so specific, smooth and cool to the touch and flexible without feeling fragile.

The new deck I bought was nothing like it. And it made me so sad any time I tried to use it because even though it was still beautiful, it wasn't the deck I remembered. I felt so guilty for letting that first deck go and devastated that I might never feel those cards again. I found the original version on ebay recently and bought it. And it feels so great! Just like I remember. Now that I know more about cards and have seen a lot to compare them, I can see that the new ones are actually an improvement in basically every way. But I don't care, I missed these cards and I have them again!

For right now, I'm keeping both. The difference in texture gives them completely different vibes and I colored the edges differently to match those vibes. They both stay in the same bag, and they remind me to take better care of the things I value but also not to get too hung up on the way things used to be. I think I'll probably pass one of them on at some point, but I'm not there yet.

Light Work vs Shadow Work

The decks that made the most sense to me for this are another kind of matched set of oracles I made. In this case, they're both standard playing card decks. I assigned symbols for each card and wrote the titles in sharpie, sometimes with very simple illustrations or written in a way that the word itself is an illustration.

I won't get into the specific titles or descriptions because they're both connected to meditation/journey work I do and are very specific and private to me. But in general, the first one (light work) is based on fairy tales, Ghibli films, and similar kid-friendly stories about interacting with spiritual realms. The other (shadow work) is a chthonic deck inspired by myths of Dionysus, Persephone, Hekate, and Loki.

Before I met my partner, he went through a phrase where he was really into astrology, which he now does not believe in at all. I think he's probably a little embarrassed about it, but he'll still talk about it pretty openly. Everyone goes through a process of learning about the world and deciding how to learn it.

I never got into astrology because I don't actually know what time I was born beyond early morning and my mom hates answering questions. So I was always kinda sad I couldn't do one because it wouldn't be “accurate.”

Today I finally realized that was some serious nonsense. I don't believe in astrology, I don't think it's magic and your personality is predetermined like that. I treat it like tarot, the way you respond to whatever you find is the most important part of the process. The cards themselves are arbitrary, sometimes they fit and sometimes you have to stretch to make them fit, and I've learned way more from disagreeing with texts and cards and teachers than I ever have from just memorizing answers.

So it doesn't really matter what my star chart looks like or whether I got the time right, and therefore it doesn't much matter what time I was actually born. To me, with apologies if you believe astrology is actually very accurate and precise and must be followed to the letter.

I do know from when my mom had to answer questions for a class assignment that I was born pretty early in the morning, so I decided on a time that felt right in that range (and then later learned there's a pretty long gap in the categories that matter and therefore I had a good enough idea anyway) and told my partner I was gonna do my chart. And also that I was jealous I could never do mine, which I had apparently never said before because he would have told me that it's not that precise, but whatever.

We still have the astrology book he learned from and told me about very soon after we started dating. “The Only Astrology Book You'll Ever Need” by Joanna Martine Woolfolk. So I grabbed it and started going through it, but I was getting confused so he helped me out step by step and now I have a chart! And some very basic notes on what each house represents.

There's so much information I didn't know astrology included, it was a lot of fun. I'm looking forward to actually digging into the book on my own and learning more about what all of this brand new shiny information is supposed to mean for me and deciding how I feel about it.

And then go back and listen to “Written in the Stars” by Alexandria Bellefleur again. That was one of my books from last year and it was so good. There's a lot of references to astrology that aren't really important to understand and enjoy the book, but might be more fun when I have a better idea what the main character is talking about. And then the other two books in the series!

It's also officially time for my Grady Hendrix book of the year. I haven't read “We Sold Our Souls” yet even though I've had it for a few years and I have read all his other books in my collection, so I guess it's finally time! (It's not like I haven't wanted to read it, I just always wanted to read another one more.)

Yay October!

Things that I've been reading/watching/listening to lately and have too much to say for a mastodon post but too little to say to talk about them on their own blog post.

Do Revenge

I listened to the Netflix suggestion immediately for a change, and I'm glad I did. This was so much fun and just a little cringe at times but overall very worth it.

Camila Mendes and Maya Hawke are both incredible and their characters are horrifically delightful and I want all the best for these awful, awful people. Also Sarah Michelle Gellar is in this and she's just GAH. I don't even have words, I just love her so much.

The cringe is mostly the way “woke” words are used, but I think even that is more because it's overlapping with other things I've seen recently. I love She-Hulk and I thought The Craft: Legacy was great, seeing girl-centric with all the focus on relationships and personal power makes me really happy. And the occasional nod to real-world patriarchal bullshit is nice and cathartic. But at a certain point it just feels obligatory and hollow and takes too much focus away from the feminine joy and power I want to see.

In this movie it's only ever used ironically. The cishet white boy villain uses performative wokeness as a weapon, the Latina main character only ever mentions that she's a woman of color (her words) when she's reminding people how bad it looks for them to target her. It's really gross. And I can't tell if it's supposed to be gross or if someone thought we needed this. Or whether it's supposed to be that they're handling it badly or that the writers think this is what social justice looks like.

Or maybe it's just what they think teenagers look like, regardless of what they're doing. It does have a general vibe of teens being awful because learning compassion takes time and experience and trauma, so maybe misusing this language is more of the same. I don't know, I don't get it, but I still really like the movie and it's only ever a few moments at a time.

Definitely worth a watch, and if you do let me know what you think please.

Cobra Kai

I can't anymore and that makes me sad.

I watched the first episode of the new season and I've liked this show a lot but it just keeps trying to ramp up the stakes and drama and I really need some fluff. Why can't it just be a fun show about kids learning karate and being friends?

Bloodthirst Hearts

This is a podcast/radio drama about a group of former close friends at a convention where there is also an actual embodiment of the monster from the series they're celebrating. I'm only a few episodes in but I love it so far. Friendship, fandom, and monsters! Yay!

Hocus Pocus Tarot

Does this count as media? Whatever, it's related to a movie, I'm counting it.

It's such a cute deck. But more than that, it's a really good deck and useful for thinking and learning about tarot. What drew me to tarot in the first place was the idea that all these archetypes match so well to so many stories, that we all go through these cycles and live these symbols over and over again. That made sense for the majors but I had difficulty with the minor arcana until someone explained to me that each of the suits is also telling their own story that you can follow from card to card.

And that sounds great but can be hard to see when you're just looking at individual cars, especially pip cards without a clear scene illustrating the ideas they represent. I worried about that with this deck since it is a pip deck, but I didn't need to worry.

I do recommend reading through the entire guide book before starting to play with the deck. All of the cards are shown in the book, so you can read the descriptions and follow the story they tell and then on each page look at the card next to its description to get an idea of why it was chosen and make that connection with the card.

It turns out that even if you're just looking at a number of candles, the candles are drawn differently on each card, you can see shadows or note the style and bring to mind what that represents in the larger story. I haven't needed to check the book since that first reading, and I think this is my new go-to recommendation for someone who wants to get started reading tarot.

What else am I doing?

I've kept up the daily tarot draw. Working from home makes this habit a lot easier to build since I don't have to depend on getting up early setting aside time for it. I just keep the deck at my work desk so while I'm waiting for my computer to boot up I can shuffle yesterday's card back into it and draw the new one. I display it right between my monitors so I'm looking at it all day long and it's working really well so far.

I also started a journaling practice so at the end of the day I can reflect on the card and what I think I need to learn from it. For awhile I'd been considering this but was trying to decide if I should start a new blog for it even though that caused some anxiety.

It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that doing very personal journaling online is actually terrible for me and probably part of why I'd abandoned various spiritual practices in the past decade or so. So now I'm journaling offline again, still with a computer because writing by hand hurts my hands and also results in entries I can't read, but just for myself. Much better solution.

I'm reading actual books again, too, just slowly. After watching a documentary about tree communication networks (“Intelligent Trees,” absolutely worth a watch) and being completely fascinated, I found a couple of books on the subject and I'm super excited about them. Suzanne Simard's “Finding the Mother Tree” is first and I'm not very far in it yet, but I'm enjoying it and expect to keep reading.

I've also been listening to Kiki's Delivery Service when I need a narrative to follow to keep my mind focused at work. That hasn't been so much of a problem lately so it's going slow, I've still got about an hour left in the book after several months. But I do want to save it for when I need it since I know it works so well, so that might take awhile.

Any thoughts or recommendations? Let me know!